When Tragedy Strikes
by WillowDream203
Summary: Their relationship is tested when tragedy strikes. Their instincts tell them to do very different things, but their love for each other gives them pause. Mature themes, depressing, dark situations.
1. Chapter 1

"Sirius? I'm going to go to Diagon Alley with Lily and Harry. Do you need anything?" Remus shrugged his cloak over his jumper, tucking his wand and a small bag of gold into his pocket.

"I don't think so. Oh! Get another bag of those crisps I like. What are they called? Farters?" The sandy haired man rolled his eyes, smiling at his boyfriend's ignorance.

"Fritos, Sirius." Grinning cheekily, he rounded the corner and wrapped his arm around the slightly smaller man.

"Whatever. Those Muggles come up with the strangest names for their food but it's damn tasty. Just like you," Remus chuckled as Sirius planted a sound kiss on his lips.

"I know what you're trying to do! You're trying to seduce me. I need to go meet Lily! Harry needs a new romper and you're nibbling my ear. Oh, Sirius you know what nibbling my ear does to me!" Remus leaned into the embrace of his boyfriend, sighing with pleasure as Sirius' lips traced a path from the base of his ear, down the side of his neck to his collar bone where he was sucking on a love mark that he'd put there the night before.

"Are you telling me you don't want it, Rem?" Sirius chuckled when all he got was a breathy sigh in response. Pulling his lips away and adjusting his lover's scarf strategically around his delicious throat, Sirius slipped his hands into his pockets and took a step back.

"Get out of here, you. You have a date to keep." He opened his eyes, scowling at the other man briefly before walking over and placing a gentle kiss on his lips.

"I'll be back before long. I love you, Siri." Sirius tenderly brushed the back of his fingers along his cheek at his words.

"I love you too, Rem. See you soon." Remus turned and opened the door when Sirius remembered something that he was supposed to ask.

"Oh, you wouldn't mind if I have the boys come round tonight for some cards and some drinks, yeah?" Golden eyes met silver in a skeptical look.

"We won't get out of control, I promise!" The lycan frowned, staring the other man down before sighing and shrugging.

"I suppose not. Just remember my mum and dad are coming tomorrow. You have to be up in the morning to help me clean it up." A grin cracked across his face before he walked back into the kitchen. Remus cringed when he heard something crash to the floor.

"I don't want to know..." he muttered before shutting the door behind him.

* * *

"SIRIUS FUCKING BLACK GET IN HERE RIGHT NOW!" The dark haired man groaned pitifully, pulling his pillow over his head to drown out the sounds of his boyfriend's screams from the living room. The light streaming in the window made his eyes burn, the volume of Remus' voice made his head pound, any little bit of movement he made caused his stomach to churn unpleasantly. His mind was far too foggy to try to comprehend why Remus was screaming so early in the morning. It was early, wasn't it? Opening his eye a crack, Sirius read the neon numbers on his clock beside his bed. 12:26 pm. Okay, so maybe not early.

"ARGH!" Sirius screamed as he was doused in cold water, sitting bolt upright and facing a livid werewolf. He instantly regretted his decision as the bedroom swayed before him.

"Sirius. What did I tell you when you asked me if you could host a drunken game night at our apartment?"

"Ungh." Remus watched as his boyfriend's face paled and the silvery eyes looked around for the rubbish bin before leaning over it and retching his stomach's contents into it.

"Feel better?" Sirius shook his head as he heaved into the bin again. Having mercy on his pathetic lover, Remus pulled his hair back and handed him a combination of anti-nausea and hangover potion. The animagus just scowled at him, ejecting more leftover firewhiskey from his stomach.

"Ungh, Rem do you honestly think I can keep anything down right now?"

"Hush you and take the potion." Sirius took the vial, swallowing hard before pouring it into his mouth, grimacing at the taste. His stomach was on the verge of spitefully contracting again as he waited for the potion to kick in. Buggering fuck, it wasn't going to happen. He heard Remus sigh as the potion came back up with a vengeance, his eyes watering as he coughed and sputtered.

"I feel like I should pity you on some level except for the fact that I told you that you shouldn't have that party last night because my parents were coming by to see the flat today and not to go too crazy. You never listen until your head's practically in the bin when you swear up and down that you'll never do this again." Remus kept scolding him, ignoring the weak heaving from his boyfriend as he conjured a cool, wet towel and put it on the back of the animagus' neck.

"Wait here, I'll go see to James."

"Because I can go so- hungh- fucking far, you cheeky bastard." Sirius called, leaning his forehead against the rim of the bin. His breathing was shallow and all he wanted to do was roll over and die.

Remus' eyes landed on the bespectacled young man lying on his couch on his back, snores emitting from his partially open mouth. The lycan smiled evilly as he opened another vial of hangover potion and raised his wand.

"Aguamenti!" A jet of water hit the boy whose eyes flew open with a sharp gasp milliseconds before Remus stuck the bottle in his mouth not giving him a chance to start getting sick. The lycan pinched the dark haired man's nose, fixing a stern look on him when he began to protest.

"Swallow." He watched as James' throat moved as the potion was swallowed, releasing his hold on his nose but keeping his hand clamped over his mouth in the hopes that the potion will stay down. After a minute of waiting with no negative results, Remus released his friend's face and sighed.

"How much did you two drink? I haven't seen him this bad since your stag party." James groaned, sitting up as he rubbed his eyes with the heel of his hand.

"I'm not sure how much he drank. I lost count after the third bottle of firewhiskey was emptied. We left the bottles and things over there if you'd like to check yourself." Remus turned toward the rest of the sitting room warily before his eyes widened in shock. 6 empty and one three-quarter empty bottles of firewhiskey were sitting haphazardly around the table, at least 15 empty bottles of butterbeer and various other drinks, muggle and wizard included. If he hadn't known that there were only 5 people drinking that night, he would have thought this had been a larger party.

"You drank _6 bottles of firewhiskey?!_ Are you out of your bloody fucking minds? What in Merlin's name were you even thinking! No, don't answer that. You clearly weren't. If Lily hadn't called looking for you three times this morning, I'd string you up myself. However, I don't think I need to because your wife, James Potter, is absolutely livid with you." James' face instantly paled at the mention of his wife's name as a look of dawning and terror filled his face in an almost comical expression.

"Buggering fuck, Lily had to work. I'm supposed to watch Harry. What time is it?"

"Probably about 12:45 in the afternoon now." James cursed and sprang up off the couch, darting over to the Floo and making his way home as quickly as he could.

"She was supposed to be in at 10 this morning. She's going to kill me." Remus rolled his eyes as his friend took a shaky breath and stepped into the green flames. With a sigh and a glance around the room, Remus vanished the empty bottles and with another flick of his wrist the cards, poker chips and crisp bags disappeared. A loud crash and the sound of gagging reminded him that he had a still very hungover boyfriend and an impending parental visit to deal with. Picking up a new bottle of hangover potion and anti-nausea potion, he made his way to the bedroom where Sirius was now lying on the floor beside the bin with sick all over the floor.

"Sirius. What are you doing?" Remus sighed before sitting Sirius up again.

"Do you think you can keep these down this time?" Taking a shaky breath, the dark haired man shrugged.

"May as well try." Remus handed the two vials over and watched as his lover poured them both into his mouth and swallowed. After a minute of waiting, they knew they were safe.

"Feel better?" Sirius nodded and ran a hand down his face. They sat quietly for a moment before Sirius chanced a glance at Remus.

"I'm sorry it got so out of control last night. I didn't mean-"

"You never _mean_ Sirius. You just didn't think at all." Sirius frowned at his boyfriend, hurt at the unspoken 'like usual' that Remus tactfully left off.

"I said I was sorry, Rem. What else do you want me to do? I can help you clean if you want. It couldn't take a second."

"I've already cleaned up."

"Then what do you want?"

"I want you to care, Sirius!" Remus said furiously, rising to his feet as Sirius followed. "I want you to care that my parents are going to be here in two hours to meet you and to see our flat. I want you to be nervous to meet them as my boyfriend. I want you not to get completely pissed so that don't have to worry about you as well as taking care of the flat! You're not a child, Sirius and I want you to act thusly. Is that really so much to ask?" He was hurt. He was fuming. He was so beyond upset that Sirius would do this to him _again_ that he didn't even care that he might be hurting his lover's feelings. There are only so many happy occasions nowadays, only so many opportunities to forget that they could die at any time just by being what they were and his twat of a boyfriend had made it a hassle, stressful and had yet again acted like a child turning what could have been a happy moment and made it nothing but annoying for Remus.

"Oh really? Am I acting like a child? Is that how you feel, Remus? That I'm too bloody immature for you and your proper adult life?" Sirius had risen to his feet, his eyes just slightly higher than Remus' blazing with fury and hurt.

"Well when you do this to yourself, that's one thing. When you drag your friends into it as well, oh yes that's well done."

"James could have done whatever he bloody well pleased!"

"No, Sirius. He does what _you_ want! He's always done what you wanted. And you always do what he wants. You two are like fucking children! Now Lily's furious with him because he was supposed to watch Harry and instead he was passed out here with you. Don't you get it? He's a father. He has responsibilities to his wife and son. He can't afford to be a child anymore. For fuck's sake, we're in the middle of a bloody war! They could come here whenever they wanted. We could all be dead tomorrow. We can't afford to be complete rubbish because we drank too much the night before!" Remus' voice gradually rose through his speech until he was flat out yelling at the other man. As the words poured out of his mouth, Sirius got more and more sombre and distant until the moment when he completely shut down.

"So that's it then. You're clearly so unhappy with me and everything I do it makes me wonder if you even want me here at all. So once you figure that out, let me know. Until then I'll just get out of your hair." With mouth hanging open, Remus watched Sirius turn toward the closet, grab a bag and start shoving clothes in it.

"You're running away? That's your grand plan? Just leaving? Oh, well I suppose that's just like you then. Just running away from your problems instead of facing them because that would be fucking terrifying, wouldn't it? Absolutely petrifying for you to actually feel something. Fine! Go! Run off and drink yourself into a stupor. I won't be there to clean it up for you!" With a hateful glare, Sirius Apparated from the flat. Remus stared at the spot where he stood for a moment before rounding on a wall, forcing his fist through it with all the force he had. Pain shot up his arm as he heard the sharp pops of broken bones. He sank to his knees, tears streaming down his face and screamed out the frustration he felt at the man who'd just left and the pain that was his heart ripping into pieces.

Sirius was gone. There's no telling if he was going to come back. And even if he did, there's no proof that anything would go back to normal. Knowing him, Sirius was going to get completely pissed and fuck the first person who approached him. The thought of it made the tears come harder than before and he felt sick to his stomach. There was nothing left he could do. He'd chased the only person he'd ever loved away. And now he didn't know if he'd ever see him again.

Hell, he called him a child. He'd told Sirius that he was the reason James got into trouble. Remus paced into the living room, staring at the fireplace with every pass unsure if he should go to James and Lily's for that was almost certainly where Sirius would go once he was through at the bar. No, he wouldn't go just yet. Lily would still be at work and he didn't want to burden James with this. Not while he was to be watching Harry. No, Remus would just wait. He went into the kitchen, took out the last remaining bottle of Firewhiskey and poured himself a glass, wincing when he tried to flex his broken hand. Well, now he knew what he would do for the next few hours until he went to the Potter's. Pouring the alcohol into his mouth, Remus went to set his hand.

* * *

His hand ached as the Skele-Grow did its work but it was now time to go. Throwing Floo powder into the fireplace, he stuck his head in and said "Godric's Hollow, The Potters." Nothing. Remus frowned, pulled his head from the fireplace and tried again.

"Godric's Hollow, The Potters."

Again, nothing.

_Odd,_ Remus thought to himself. Maybe Lily had shut down the Floo. He'd just Apparate there. It was less hassle anyway. He wrapped his cloak around him, took a deep breath and disappeared with a crack and a spin.

Something was wrong. Remus knew the moment he landed and his breath was stolen from him. Smoke filled the air, the glow of flames burned from the far side of the square and there, among the stars floated the sickening skull and snake. The Dark Mark. They'd been here.

"James...Lily...Harry!" He took off running. Remus slipped on leaves that littered the October ground but didn't slow a bit. With every step, his heart sank.

_It's not their house. Please, God let it not be their house._ Rounding the corner, he froze. The house was little more than rubble, the ruins smoking. The gate in the front hung off of one of its hinges and the front door was blasted straight off. Gripping his wand, Remus quickly walked into the house.

"James? James?! Lily? Where are you? Can you hear me?" Remus called into the silence of the house.

"Lumos," With wand raised aloft, Remus made his way through the foyer. Plates and dishes, pictures and furniture all shattered and splintered around the room. Scorch marks lined the walls and glass was blown out of windows. Remus made it to the hallway and choked. There was James, brave, strong, courageous, arrogant, loving James covered in the ruins of his home lying at the base of the stair. Remus kneeled down beside him, touching his cheek, checking for a pulse that he knew he wouldn't find.

"Oh, James," The knot in Remus' throat nearly suffocated him as he gazed upon his friend, the man he'd just seen that morning sleeping on his couch. The man who'd left in a fright because his wife-

His wife.

"Lily. LILY!" Remus ran up the stair, checking each room as he came to it. Their bedroom, the bath, the spare guest room. All rooms empty until he came to Harry's nursery. The flame of her hair was spread across the floor in front of her as she lay face down before Harry's empty cot. He felt his shoulder hit the door frame as his knees collapsed beneath him. Tears overwhelmed him as a sob was ripped from his throat.

"No...no, no, no, no, no! NOOO!" He dropped his wand as his hand grasped the splintered wood beside him. His breath came in rasps and he could barely see. He didn't want to see. They were gone. His best friends were gone. Their son had vanished because if he'd been killed, his body would have been left in his cot. The Potters were gone.

The sound of sirens pulled Remus out of his misery. He had to get out of there. The muggles would be there soon and he couldn't be found in there. Wiping his face on his sleeve, he picked up his wand, went over to Lily, kissed her temple and Apparated back to his flat. With a crash, he collided with the coffee table before falling to his knees and openly sobbing. James and Lily were gone. He could hardly believe it. He'd spoken with Lily that morning. James was lying on that couch. And now they were lying dead on the floor of their home.

"S-Sirius! Sirius!" Remus looked around, calling for his lover before remembering that he wasn't here. He may never be here again. He felt his heart clench even harder in his chest at the thought that he would never see any of the Marauders ever again. But there would still be Peter. No, they hadn't seen Peter in months outside of the Order meetings. Remus didn't think that now he would all of a sudden make some kind of reappearance. Instead, he remained where he lay and sobbed.

* * *

Sirius had Apparated down the block from the flat he shared with Remus. He'd spent the day walking around London, avoiding bars and trying to create some semblance of sense in his head. He knew everything was entirely his fault. Remus had every right to be angry. He always liked things to be nice for his parents and Sirius had mucked it all up. Like usual. He'd crossed the Thames twice on this line of thinking before he'd realized that night had fallen and he should be getting home to make his amends.

He stood outside the door, debating on whether to just let himself in or to knock and let Remus invite him inside when he heard the most heart wrenching sob he'd ever heard in his life.

_Oh Gods I made him cry._ Sirius pressed his fist into his forehead before wrapping his hand around the doorknob and walking in. Remus was sitting in the living room beside the coffee table, sobbing harder than he'd ever seen him cry.

Something was wrong.

"Remus?" Tear filled eyes turned to him quickly and that had confirmed it for Sirius. Something was very, very wrong.

"S-Sirius? W-what...?" Sirius rushed over to his boyfriend, wrapping his arms around him and rocking him.

"I'm so sorry. I know it was all my fault. I didn't mean to make a mess of everything. I know how important it is for your parents to visit. I was just being a tit. It was James, really. He thought it would be a grand idea if we took shots as parts of the bets. I'm so sorry Remus, please forgive me." Remus pressed his hand against the babbling animagus' lips, silencing him.

"Siri..." Remus choked on the words he knew he had to say as tears came anew. "Oh Siri." He fell against the strong frame of his lover, fisting his hands in his cloak and soaking the shoulder of it with his tears. In that instant, Sirius knew this went far beyond the fight they had that morning.

"What's happened, Remus? It's alright, love. You can tell me." Cupping his cheeks, Sirius forced Remus to meet his eyes. "Remus? Please, you're scaring me." With a deep hiccuping breath, Remus said it.

"James and Lily are dead."

**I have almost nothing to say. This was long but I now have a bunch of ideas for this and I'm really excited about it. Let me know what you think! 3**

**Also, I have a facebook page! Come and check it out! WillowDream203. It'll have updates, some sneak previews and you'll be able to post a request on the wall and if there is enough interest in it, I'll try to write it up for you. Hope to see you there!**

**Love, Willow**


	2. Chapter 2

The words echoed in his head. He heard that Remus had said _something_ but the meaning of those words couldn't be fathomed. Sirius' heart was pounding away in his chest, praying that what Remus was saying to him wasn't true.

"What did you say?"

"J-James and L-Lily. They're dead, Sirius. I w-went to their house today t-to f-find you. T-to ap-pologize to you for b-being s-such a t-tit. A-and the h-house was d-destroyed and I f-found James and L-Lily and I c-couldn't f-find H-Harry and I d-didn't k-know what to d-do." Tears came afresh in Remus' eyes as Sirius tried to process what he was saying. They're dead? No. No, it couldn't be. He'd just seen the sod last night. His eyes fixed on the man before him, openly sobbing and trembling with grief.

He was telling the truth.

In a move quick as lightning, Sirius grabbed Remus by the shoulders and pulled him in close.

"Who did this, Remus? Who did it?" Shaking his head, the sandy haired man tried to speak through his tears.

"I d-don't know, S-Sirius. T-the h-house w-was destroyed. I w-wasn't t-there when i-it h-happened."

"We all know it was Voldemort. He's the reason they were hiding in the first place. How did he find them? Who told him where they were?" Remus looked at Sirius, half crazed and looking for blood, sniffed and wiped his face on his sleeve.

"You think there's a leak? Someone's telling Order secrets to Voldemort?"

"Oh come on, has that never occurred to you? That someone stupid and gullible from our side would think that they would benefit from letting the cat out of the bag for the whole Dark Side? We've been trying to figure it out for weeks before something like this would happen." He rose, pacing around the living room as Remus tried keeping up. Looking at Sirius, his lover could see that he would strangle any man who confronted him with anything in the near future. On his next pass, he froze.

"Harry," Sirius grabbed Remus' shoulders again and hauled him nearly to his feet. "What about Harry. Wasn't he there? Did you find him?"

"No. He wasn't in his cot. But he's alive. They would have just left him there if they killed him but there was no trace of him." With a growl, Sirius ran his hands roughly through his hair once more before grabbing Remus by the shoulders.

"Was it you? So help me God, Remus if you're the leak—" Remus shoved the other man away from him roughly.

"_ME?!_ You think that I would leak that to _him_?! You think I'm the reason they're dead?!"

"Well you have the most to gain from allying yourself with—"

Knock, knock, knock.

Both men turned to the door of their flat. They straightened in a flash and pulled their wands. Sirius moved behind the door as Remus took his position behind an armchair. They nodded to each other and Sirius swung the door open.

It was Frank Longbottom.

"What is your favorite candy?" Sirius asked, pointing his wand directly in the auror's face.

"Smarties though you can never find those in Honeyduke's. Damn Muggle candy."

"Where did I have to go on the 13th of this month?" Remus asked quietly. Both Sirius and Remus watched closely for Frank's answer.

"You were quarantined in the Shrieking Shack like you have been all through Hogwarts. Do I need to detail the reasons or are you sufficiently assuaged?" the two men lowered their wands and Frank stepped over the threshold.

"To what do we owe the visit, Frank?" Remus asked tiredly, tucking his wand back into his pocket.

"Unfortunately it's not a social call, I'm afraid. Something's happened." Remus nodded, sitting heavily in a chair.

"James and Lily are dead." Frank looked at Remus then to Sirius.

"How did you know?"

"I went to visit them this evening. The mark was in the sky, their house was in ruins," Remus met the other man's eyes. "Harry wasn't there. Is he…?" Frank shook his head.

"Hagrid had taken him out of the house. He's fine. A scratch on his head, but he's fine. Sounds like you were there seconds after he left." Sirius and Remus breathed sighs of relief.

"He's alright. Thank Godric, he's alright." Remus pressed the heel of his hand into his eyes as he nearly wept in relief. Sirius took half a step toward him but stopped himself, remembering what he'd just accused Remus of.

"Who told him?" Frank put his hands in his pocket, looking directly at Sirius.

"Sirius, I know what you want to do. I want to as well. But we don't really know—"

"Bullshit!" Sirius slammed his hand into the back of the chair. "You know whose fault this was. If not for certain, you at least have an idea."

"Sirius I don't want you to do anything rash—"

"Fuck me being rash! My best friend and his wife are dead. Their son is an orphan at one year old. I want to get the bastard who took his family away." Frank opened his mouth to argue again.

"Just tell him, Frank," Remus said softly, looking at the floor. Honey gold eyes met the hazel of his friend. "Just tell him who the Order thinks it was. He'll find out sooner or later anyway." For a moment, no one moved. No one spoke. No one even made a sound. Frank looked from one man to the other, analyzing whether they would be ready for this or not. With a sigh, he lowered his head and spoke.

"We think it was Peter."

**I need to figure out different ways to end these chapters. Dialogue is just _so_ cliff hangy. :) Let me know what you think! And don't forget to check out my Facebook page WillowDream203. **

**XX Willow**


	3. Chapter 3

Sirius and Remus were stunned into silence. Frank's eyes moved between the two men uncomfortably before scratching the back of his head.

"Well you're taking this better than I thought you would." The baritone of his voice shocked Remus out of his stupor.

"_Peter?!_ You think that it was Peter who sold them out?"

"He was their Secret Keeper, Remus. You understand why we're thinking what we're thinking."

"Yes but both Sirius and I knew where Lily and James were living. Most of the people in the Order knew. You don't honestly believe it was Peter."

"Remus, he was under the Fidelius Charm. You know he's the only one capable of telling _anyone_."

**CRASH.**

Remus and Frank nearly jumped out of their skins as the coffee table in front of the couch flew across the living room. Where it once stood was Sirius, face redder than anyone had ever seen before and looking for blood. Remus slowly rose to his feet as Frank's hand drifted toward his wand holstered on his hip.

"Sirius, please calm down. Damaging our furniture won't bring James and Lily back just like it won't get revenge on Peter for what he's done." If looks could kill, Remus would have been dust on the floor under Sirius' gaze.

"I'm going to kill him." The voice that came from his boyfriend's mouth was possessed, eerily calm and more terrifying than realizing the full moon was seconds away and he was still in the Great Hall. Those words had been spoken so matter of factly that Sirius could have been talking about the weather.

"Sirius he's our friend—"

"THAT BASTARD SOLD OUT JAMES AND LILY. THEY'RE DEAD BECAUSE OF HIM. HARRY'S AN ORPHAN BECAUSE OF HIM. THAT SON OF A BITCH IS NO FRIEND OF MINE." The silence echoed around their flat in the wake of Sirius' bellows. His lover had never yelled at him before but under the circumstances, it was understandable. Turning to Frank, Remus decided to bring up a topic that was important to all of them.

"What's going to happen to Harry?" Frank slipped his wand back into its holster and crossed his arms.

"He's going to Lily's sister. They have a son their own about his age. Dumbledore thinks that it would be a good idea."

"Dumbledore's sending him to that Muggle bitch? She didn't ever even want anything to do with Harry when James and Lily were alive, what makes him think that they'll want anything to do with him now that they're dead?" Sirius spat with venom in his voice.

"They're the only family he's got, Sirius."

"Blood means shit if they hate you." Neither Frank nor Remus had anything to say about that. They knew what Sirius meant.

"It was what Dumbledore decided. There's nothing left to do about it."

"There has to be something. Sirius and I are more of a family to Harry than Petunia and Vernon ever were."

"Then maybe you should be the ones to take him instead." Remus and Sirius spun around, wands aloft at the soft voice behind them. Albus Dumbledore had just snuck into their house without anyone knowing.

"Bloody hell, I need to strengthen those wards." Remus rubbed his face tiredly as he let his wand arm fall and his body sink into the couch behind him.

"What do you mean we should take him?" Sirius, on the other hand had hardly relaxed his stance at all. His wand wasn't pointing at the older wizard, but his back was still rigid, his eyes piercing into the twinkling blue ones.

"You seem to think that Petunia and Vernon Dursley are unfit to raise Harry and are not afraid to say so."

"I'm not," Sirius growled.

"Well in lieu of sending him to an orphan's asylum, I propose that you and Remus care for him instead." Remus stared at the profile of his boyfriend, listening intently to what he was going to say or do next. Onyx eyes turned to his face in an unreadable expression that terrified him and made his heart beat a little bit faster.

"Rem?" Nothing. Remus had nothing to say, nothing to think. Take Harry as his own son? He already felt like he was more his son than anyone else. He was a bit of hope, the ray of sunshine in the middle of this heinous war that shone despite all odds and gave their friends at the Order a tangible reason to fight along with the other children born of the Order members.

But could they risk it? Could they take this child who had just lost his parents, give him a new family, love him and care for him knowing that they could go out one day and never come back, orphaning him once again? Maybe the Dursley's were a better choice of a family for him. They, at least, weren't targets in this war. At least they could give him a safe home.

He would be safe.

**Stupidly long time since I updated this. I'm sorry guys :( **

**Anyway, I hope you enjoy this chapter. Thanks for being patient. You guys are the best :)**

**Love, Willow**


	4. Chapter 4

"Remus? What do you think?" Sirius could see it in his lover, he was far away. He was barely hearing anything they were saying. It was a decision that hardly warranted even a second's worth of deliberation. Harry was already family to him, the only family left that was precious at all. Sirius would die for Harry, protect him until he couldn't do it anymore and he simply couldn't bear to see this precious child grow up like a bloody Muggle with people who hated him.

"I...don't know, Sirius. He's not really any safer with us than he was with James and Lily. We're targets just as much as they are. The only way we can really get him somewhere safe would be to send him to Vernon and Petunia."

"I can't believe you're saying that. You would have taken him in a heartbeat if it were James and Lily asking you to. You don't want him, do you? You want to see him raised by that bitch and her troll of a husband because you don't want him." Sirius had never seen his boyfriend look so tired, so worn out. It was as though every moment of the war was etched on his face, every friend that they'd lost, every life they'd taken.

"That's not what I fucking said, Sirius. Don't you dare start putting words in my mouth." Remus' eyes flashed with anger with every word that Sirius had said. "Of course I want him. I love that child like he were my own. James and Lily didn't just mean the universe to you, Sirius. They meant the world to me too. You have to understand that not ten minutes ago you were about to go out and hunt Peter down simply because people think he's the one who told You-Know-Who where they were. Harry can't have that in a father because he's already lost one. If we were to take him, we could not fight on the front lines anymore. We would never be able to be the ones to physically take revenge for their deaths like I know you want to because we would be responsible for his safety, his life, for providing for him in every way that James and Lily did and were going to. We also have to be aware of the fact that every Death Eater out there is going to be hunting him because their master didn't succeed in killing him meaning that we have to be more careful than ever for his sake. Are you ready to take all of that on?"

"Yes." Remus stared into Sirius' eyes. He could see it, with every fiber of his being that he was ready to do everything that would be expected of him and more. He was ready to give up his life as a reckless thrill-seeker and settle down with him, with Harry forever. There was just one more thing...

"And me? You'll protect him from me?"

"He doesn't need protecting from you, Moons."

"We all know that's a lie, Sirius. We all know what I am. If the situation arose in which it was either kill me or lose him, would you be able to stop me?" Remus could see the pain in his boyfriend's eyes at the question they always avoided. But Remus, still hurt from their argument before did not back down.

"That's not even a fair question, Remus," Sirius whispered, his voice cracking slightly. Finally, Remus was angry.

"We're in a fucking war, Sirius. If anyone were to realize this now, it should be you. I'm not just talking about my monthly mishaps. I could come home one day and be Imperio-ed and would have to try to kill you or Harry. You would have to be able to stand there and kill me to protect him. James and Lily were willing to die for him, for the love of Merlin, they did! We both know they were each willing to kill for him. Would you be willing to do the same if you had to protect him from me?" Fury flashed in Sirius' silver orbs.

"Would you be able to kill me?" Remus' eyes hardened and his spine straightened from where he sat.

"I would be able to kill anyone for that boy, Sirius. You, Dumbledore, Frank, Alice. Anyone." Sirius took a step back from this man he hardly recognized anymore. Remus, sweet, loving, gentle Remus had just said that he would kill anyone that threatened Harry. And he'd included the man he said he loved on that list.

"You would do that? You would kill me?"

"Don't make this about you. This is about Harry."

"Right." Sirius stared at Remus, gauging what he wanted.

"We'll take him." Dumbledore's eyes moved to the lycan before moving to the animagus. They were in agreement.

"I'll have Hagrid bring him shortly. Do you have any amenities for him yet?" Remus shook his head.

"We'll have to get a pram and a cot and-"

"Don't worry about it, Remus. I'll take care of it," Sirius looked up at Remus for a short second before apparating out of the flat for the second time that day. Remus rubbed his eyes before slouching back in his armchair.

"Bloody fuck, I really need to strengthen those wards."


	5. Chapter 5

Sirius wandered through London, his hand tightly wrapped around his wand and his body tense. It was Hallows Eve and this night was far from normal and despite being in Muggle London, he knew that he wasn't exactly safe. Finally, he found what he was looking for. A nursery store.

As soon as he stepped through the threshold, the vast array of horrible colors hit him right in the face. Pastel pinks and blues. Everywhere. They were bloody everywhere! He looked on at prams of various colors, cots with elephants and owls to teddy bears and cakes printed on. Mobiles with stars and smiling monkeys. There was so much to choose from and he needed it all now.

"Good evening, sir. Is there anything I can help you with?" Sirius looked up at the sales clerk who'd approached him. Normally he'd be all over this lovely little blond with the delicious looking pert breasts, but he was on a mission. Remus was livid with him from their row that morning and the day had not progressed in his favor. He must do everything he could to make it better.

He'd start with the shopping.

"Uh, yes. I, uh. You see, my friends have this little boy. Great kid. Well they had, he's ours now," Sirius was babbling and he saw the clerk's eyes get wider as words kept pouring almost nonsensically out of his mouth. "Well, no it's not like we kidnapped him or anything. They had an accident and we're taking care of him now and, oh bugger, I'm just making a mess of this, aren't I?" He held his hands out in front of him and took a deep breath. She smiled gently.

"Well yeah, a little. Your friends had an accident and leave you their baby and you come in looking like something's chasing you through the streets." Sirius pulled another deep breath through his nose and ran his hand through his hair.

"Yeah, I'm a bit frazzled right now. We just found out we'd be taking care of him and we don't have anything for him. He's coming tonight, for all I know he's at our flat right now. Can you help me? We need a cot and a pram and one of those carrier things that you wear on your front and a mobile probably. Do you think we'll need anything else?" The clerk had a look on her face, discerning him and trying to figure out if she should help someone who was going to be taking care of someone else's child after the parents had an 'accident.'

"Please, I'm desperate here." Ultimately, Sirius had apparently looked confused and pitiful enough to win her sympathies. A shrewd smile came across her face as she glanced around and crossed her arms across her chest.

"Alright! I'll help you." He felt some of the tension slide out of his shoulders as he smiled back at her.

"Thank you. So much, really. Thank you," He glanced around the store, a frown creasing his brow.

"So...Where do we start?"

"Well, that depends. How much are you willing to spend?"

* * *

With two carts of baby things shrunken and stuffed into his pockets, Sirius apparated back to the flat. Remembering that Harry would probably be sleeping now, he landed outside so as not to wake him. As quietly as he could, he snuck into the house being greeted by a sight of Remus nodding off with little baby Harry sleeping snugly in his arms. With a small smile, Sirius made his way to the spare bedroom to start setting things up. With all but the finishing touches done, he found the small portable bed that he'd purchased and brought it back to the living room. As gently as he could, he took Harry from Remus' arms and laid him down in the little cot.

"Sirius-" Remus blearily sat upright before Sirius put his finger to his lips and walked back toward the guest room. With the heel of his hand rubbing his eye, Remus followed. The darker man smiled when he heard the soft gasp of surprise from his lover.

He'd transfigured the walls to be a soft light blue, the cot and the mobile set up by the window with sheer white curtains over it. Stars sparkled behind wisps of clouds against the ceiling and the quiet sound of crickets magically came from the walls. There was a small changing table where Sirius was packing away cloth diapers and the plastic liners beside the wet wipes and the basket of items that needed to go to the kitchen. The closet had baskets lining the shelves transfigured from hangers filled with tiny onesies, shirts and trousers of varying sizes, labeled so they would know what to grab for the baby when they were in a rush. Another shelf had tiny shoes lining it with sweaters waiting to be pulled over a baby head.

"Where did all this stuff come from?" Sirius smiled at his fatigued counterpart before laying a small blanket for Harry in the cot.

"I told you that I would take care of it and I did. Are you really that surprised?"

"No, no I'm not surprised. Well, I am but that's mainly because I didn't know you even knew what we would need to get." Sirius grinned sheepishly before shoving his hands into his pockets.

"I had some help from the girl at the shop. She was far too excited to get me all the things I would need for little Harry." Remus rolled his eyes. Of course there was a girl.

"Now don't act that way, it wasn't like that. She was just really helpful, that's all." Sirius made his way back to the living room and gently picked up the sleeping child. With more care than Remus had ever seen him use with anything, the animagus laid Harry in bed, tucked the blanket around him and ushered Remus out of the room, grabbing the rest of the baby things that needed putting away. With a final glance over their shoulders, and a lowering of the lights the shut the door behind them.

"He seems to be doing alright." Sirius murmured, filing away the bottles and bibs where he could find space. He heard the creak of the kitchen chair taking on weight and a sigh before Remus began to speak.

"Well he was quite distraught when Hagrid brought him here. Screaming and sobbing. It was a few minutes of cuddles and silliness from Uncle Moony before he calmed down a bit. A bottle and a change later, he was fast asleep. He's had a long day, I'm afraid." Remus rubbed his eyes and looked up to find Sirius standing before him with two cups of tea and biscuits. A small smile spread across his face as Sirius sat down.

"We've all had a bit of a day today." The silence weighed on them, heavy and isolating like the darkness that accompanied it. They both knew that Harry would be missing them and that it would be a long road before he understood that Uncle Moony and Uncle Pads would be taking care of him from now on. How does anyone make an infant understand that anyway?

"Christ, it was yesterday when we saw them. Yesterday. What the fuck?" Remus laid a hand on his quickly crumbling boyfriend's shoulder. Gone was the burning anger he'd felt all day, he was too exhausted for that anymore. Now all he felt was the emptiness of loss and the confusion accompanying a new huge responsibility that he now had to bear.

"I know, Sirius. But look at it this way, they would be so happy knowing that if anyone had to take care of Harry, it was us." Sirius nodded, biting his lip hard as tears welled up in his eyes.

"But they're gone, Rem. I just...I can't believe they're gone." For the first time all day, tears slipped from between his dark lashes casting scars down his face as his heart finally broke. Remus firmly gripped the shoulders of Sirius' robes and pulled him into his arms.

**I know, so sad, so mean. All that's left now is the epilogue, folks! **

**Thanks for reading! **

**XX Willow**


	6. Chapter 6

**It has been SO long and I'm so sorry, everyone! Life has definitely been taking over and I haven't been able to pay as much attention to my stories lately. **

**Anyway, here is the last installment of this story. I hope you all enjoy it! **

"Harry, come on! The train will be leaving any minute! Sirius, you're really not helping! We were supposed to leave ages ago!" Remus called up the stairs. That boy was so like Sirius it was almost absurd. How anything ever got done in the house was a mystery to him. Actually, that's not entirely true. Remus' constant badgering of his family to do the dishes and tidy the house is how things got done. Come hell or high water, that is how they would get Harry to King's Cross before the Hogwarts Express left for the term.

Sirius came thunking down the stair, Harry's heavy trunk held in his arms. He was going on about Quidditch currently and about how Harry will help bring the Gryffindors to glory by annihilating the Slytherins for the House Cup.

"But what if I'm not in Gryffindor?" Harry asked worriedly, running a hand through his hair. The mop on his head was as untamable as James' ever was but the move that he'd just executed with perfect fluidity was completely Sirius.

"Not in Gryffindor?! Bollocks!" Sirius exclaimed.

"Sirius!"

"Of course you'll be in Gryffindor! Your mother and father were both in Gryffindor. You were raised by two Gryffindors. You're as Gryffindor a child as any out there." Remus' husband set the trunk down with a grunt, rubbing the small of his back.

"Why didn't you just levitate it, Sirius?" Amber eyes sparkled with a teasing lilt in his voice.

"Well I thought I would impress you with my show of strength instead, love," he muttered, brushing a kiss onto his cheek. Remus chuckled and waved him off, turning to his son instead.

"Harry, it doesn't matter what house you're in. You go where the Sorting Hat best sees you. You will be brilliant in any house and you will make us proud no matter where you are," Remus said softly, hugging the boy tightly. "Now we must be off, we need to get to the platform immediately."

Sirius shrunk the trunk and put it into his pocket before taking hold of both Harry and Remus tightly in his arms.

"Hold tight," He muttered before Apparating them all to the jump point near the station. The three of them hurried through the throngs of people, Sirius on point with Harry immediately behind and Remus keeping an eye on them both. Within minutes they were standing on Platform 9 3/4, Harry's emerald eyes widening in amazement.

"You ready?" Remus asked softly, laying his hand on Harry's shoulder. With a snap of his teeth, Harry nodded as he tightened his hold on the top of Hedwig's cage. Sirius pulled Harry's trunk out of his pocket and returned it to normal size, setting it down beside his son.

"Now remember, it doesn't matter what house you're sorted into. We will love you regardless. Write us as soon as you know," Sirius said with a gentle smile and a tight hug.

"But what if I'm sorted to Slytherin?" Harry asked softly.

"Then you will be the most brilliant Slytherin they have ever had," Remus said firmly, hugging Harry in turn. "Stay safe, stay out of trouble, write soon. And don't forget the Weasley's will be there as well. You won't be completely on your own."

The shrillness of the train whistle tore through the air. Harry swallowed hard, squaring his shoulders. He picked up his trunk and Hedwig and headed into the train. He mounted the steps and had soon disappeared into the shadows. Remus and Sirius exchanged a glance as they held each other's hand tightly.

"He'll be alright, love. Don't worry," Sirius whispered. Remus nodded, smiling sadly. Their boy was finally off. He was going to the place where he and his husband had met their lifelong friends and each other. It was a second home to them and he hoped that Harry would find it as such.

"I wish James and Lily could see him right now. They would be so proud."

Sirius nodded solemnly, putting his arm around Remus' shoulders.

"They are proud of him, Moony. So bloody proud, their clouds are about to burst." With a final wave to their son through the window, the train started pulling away. The dark, bespectacled face beamed out at them sitting beside the bright ginger hair of Ron Weasley. Before they knew it, the train had rounded the bend. They were gone until Christmas.

"C'mon, love. Let's go." With gentle pressure, Sirius guided Remus back toward the Apparation point and back home.

**So there you have it kids. The end. I know it was a long time coming and maybe wasn't as good as many of you wanted it to be, but I wanted the ending to be simple and sweet. You had your smut already, you fiends! **

**Please let me know what you thought. I, like always, love your feedback. **

**XX Willow**


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